The boss in your child’s brain
Our children are young, so we expect them to be irresponsible, to need our advice and supervision. We don’t expect them to be able to independently plan to meet their goals, do their homework, safely cross the road or to take on complex tasks while still very young. Why not? What is it about childhood that prevents them from these responsible behaviours?
It’s all about brain development, of course. Tasks that require wise decision making, organising, planning, managing time, thinking before you act and avoiding impulsivity are part of the functions of the front part of the brain – called the prefrontal cortex. This happens to be the very last part of the brain to develop completely – at around age 25 years. This is why adolescence can be a difficult and dangerous age. Young people have so much knowledge, skills and ability yet don’t have the brain development needed to always supervise their own actions in a wise, responsible way. We call the functions performed by this part of the brain Executive Functions. The prefrontal cortex is literally the boss of the brain.
Most children gradually develop this brain area but some may be slower in some areas than others. They may struggle with completing tasks, remembering what homework has been set, being able to stay on task, recalling important detail, and controlling strong emotions. All of us tend to develop unevenly – with some aspects streaking ahead but others lagging behind. This is normal and not necessarily a sign of a serious problem. It is also normal for such a child to need support while waiting for a very natural progression of brain development.
There are ways to help. Leaving such children alone may prevent them from reaching their potential and labelling slower development negatively may impair the very development they need. Supporting them in positive ways can help them over obstacles.
A useful website to visit for clear explanation of executive functions, help that works and ways that could worsen the situation is written by Seth Perler. The website (Google Seth Perler.com) is available and contains a wealth of information about Executive Functioning and helping to coach children through challenges. You might find the information valuable.